Thursday, February 26, 2009

Octomama, My dicontent with Jon and Kate plus 8, and reproductive technology: All in one post

Ok, well.... I didn't even think I was going to weigh in on the Octuplet mama, but CHunk's asked my thoughts, and I thought I might as well spill them here. And, since my darling wife told me tonight that everything on my blog is negative, well, why change gears now?
Anyway, octuplet mama - what else can be said? I mean, obviously, bitch is one troubled woman, and those poor kids are marked for like. You remember the saying, if it's not one thing, it's your mother?" Well, those kids will know that for a fact. But you know, as clear as the issue appears, there are some things that complicate it. So yeah, ain't no fucking way that this woman can be a good mother, because she just has babies for shits and giggles. And no doctor should have allowed her to be implanted with babies. It's a no-brainer that this is a cut and dried ethical issue, isn't it? Well yes. For me it is. But it raises larger questions, because then does that mean people have to have a certain income, or a certain marital status, or whatever, to use reproductive technology? Did anyone stop Jon and Kate from in vitro? WHo has the say as to who can and who can't get implanted? And yes, I know that she shouldn't have been, but what are the hard and fast rules as to who is eligible for these procedures? It's a murky ground if you refuse someone. For example, you know I would rather be the meat in a Rita Macneill/Anne Murray sandwich, with Rene Simard looking on eating poutine than ever cast a vote for the Conservatives. But, what if someone said "Oh, you are a Conservative, so you can't be implanted with your babies?" Stupid example, but you know what I mean - who decides who can and can't be a parent when we have this technology? I don't want to see any fetuses destined for conservative families, but as Sedaris says, "you can't kill the rooster". So, what I am trying to say is that I am disgusted by octo-mama, and disgusted that the doctors let this happen, but at the same time, I don't know if they could have stopped it, because then reproduction becomes policed. I just don't know. It's like abortion. Personally (and spare me the debate, I said personally, so believe whatever the hell you want), I just don't "believe" in abortion. This doesn't mean I am pro-life. Not by a long-shot. What I mean is, I couldn't live with myself knowing that a fetus of mine was aborted. Maybe its from having 4 kids, I dunno. But to me it is cut and dried that at conception, a life is formed. It may be a clump of cells, but that clump of cells is alive. But while I believe that life begins at conception, I also am pro-choice. I don't think anyone should have the power to tell a woman that she will have to carry a child. I am opposed to 2nd trimester and late term abortions, but I still think that if a woman is pregnant and doesn't want to be, she has that first trimester to not be. I hope she would choose otherwise, because, as I said, a life brings so much possibility, but it's not for me to play reproductive God. Likewise, as much as I am disgusted at octomother and her doctors, can we morally stop them? What if someone said "overweight near-40 year olds shouldn't have kids?" What would I do then? And that sleazy bastard, Dr. Phil, must be paying her millions to put her through the wringer. Hell, I don't believe Dr. Phil should be on tv, or that his wife should have been brought to life from cardboard, but nobody stopped that Frankenstein experiment, so again, we can't play God.
And this leads to my annoyance of Jon and Kate. I know Chunks wants to go live with them in the pinefields of Penn., but let me tell you my problem - it's not even with them, really, but TLC. I've mentioned my saddness about Little People, Big WOlrd here before, about them just being TLC puppets for the $$$. It's the same with Jon and Kate. So they ended up with a gaggle of children, sort of by accident, and they get a tv show, which helps them because they are struggling. So I thought "well good for you." But the show has gone from these struggling parents to some sort of Hollywood production. They have moved from their hovel to this fucking mansion in the country, nobody has to work, everything is new, the kids are better dressed than fucking Iman, they are travelling everywhere for free, and this was the icing on the cake: The other night, it was all "I am just waiting for the new washers and dryers to arrive", and then they do arrive. And Jon and Kate both spend 15 minutes going on and ON about "I love the Whirlpool Duets. They hold 47 towels and blah blah blah." Seriously, they said "Whirlpool Duet" repeatedly, showed them in the box, out of the box, installed, being loaded, and then after the fact, when they interview them in the basement, it's all "the duet really made life easy because 300 pairs of jeans fit into it." Then they finally break to commercial.... for the Duet.
I just felt so dirty, both for them, and for me having to watch it. Now, you know me. I'm a whore too. You give me something, I'll plug it on the blog. Hell, give me some fucking SUn-Rype juice coupons, and I'll tell you about how I bathed in the fucking apricot nectar and my b'acne disappeared (I don't have b'acne, but for free juice, I'll lie).
Now, maybe it's just sour grapes on my part. But you know, I have 4 kids, the old fashioned way. Luckily, everything in the reproductive systems of Rachel and myself work wonderfully, and I just have to sort of wag it in her direction and 9 months later we have a child. But we didn't get 4 kids because more embryos survived than what was thought, or they split. No, we have 4 kids because we wanted 4 kids. We make great babies and our kids have enriched our lives in ways we never thought possible. And they've made us better people, and I hope that we are lavishing them in love and understanding and giving them what is important. But we aren't "collecting" kids like octo-mama. And while i am glad that Jon and Kate have the means now to provide for these kids, I am resentful. SOrry, it's my negative nature. We willingly chose 4 kids, but is anyone giving us a break? No. We work our asses off to provide for them. We spend every waking moment picking up and cleaning and cooking and doing laundry and whatever to keep up with things, because we are anal that way. Rachel has to go back to work in the fall. We'd do anything to have her stay at home, but then we wouldn't be able to provide for the kids. Kate doesn't have to go back to work, and she has 8 kids..... we'd love a house with a 4th bedroom upstairs, so we could always stay on the same level. Kate has a new mansion. I'd like to have an old, used tent trailer to take the kids camping in the summers. Jon has acres of wilderness now for the kids to explore. We are literally taking our bottles in to stash $$ away in our vacation fund so the kids could perhaps see the ocean someday. All they talk about is Disney and Hawaii. Jon and Kate have been there with their kids, in luxury suites. We are counting dimes to someday buy a used Durango for driving in town, since the kids can't all fit in the car (when the other parent has the van). Jon and Kate ain't worrying about that. Finally, the WHIRLPOOL DUET. Jon and Kate have a handful of them. I have a 6 year old Maytag Neptune, which works fine, but isn't as big as the Duet, nor does it have any of the cool features. We do, I dunno, 10 loads of wash a week? 15? At least? I'd love a Duet or two. I'd tell all my friends about it. But nobody will give us one because we are boring parents with single births. Sure, 4 kids seems freakish to people, but not like multiples. Multiples are freakish, but in a good way. People just assume we are Catholic and move on. But someone has a multiple birth, and fuck, lets shower them with frankensense and myhrr. I spelled that wrong, but the hell with spellcheck. Perhaps if I had a new Toshiba Satellite, with their bang -on spell check, I would, but Toshiba must be saving that shit for Jon and Kate. So yeah, I struggle to make ends meet, I get no downtime until 11 at night, and nothing is a free ride. And I know I am entitled to nothing. But when I see JOn and Kate and Octomama having everything because they sold their story, it annoys me, because nobody wants my story. We're boring. Ah well, whatever, I love my babies and wouldn't be who I am without them, so let them all have whatever. Good for you, multiple peoples.... I'll take my singles and love them, without big washers, fancy trips, or a big house.
Seacrest Out.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

reason 305 i love judy blume

You wanna know why I love Judy Blume so much? (the italics mean nothing, i am typing in the tv screen light). Look at her post from Dec. 9th.
bitch is real! I love ya Jude, and my second grade girl got Doublefudge from the library today and was so excited i thought she was going to pee! Anyway, check out the pic of judy camped by the toilet. she is so real!

1:00 in the morning so no time to really blog. Just watching American Idol from the other night. I don't have time to blog the whole thing from yesterday, but hopefully tomorrow night! Anyway, now my tub is leaking into my basement and I don't know why - it's the drain, somehow, but I don't know..... why can't things just be fine for once? Fuck, I know we could be living in a field battling locusts, but still - I just want to sit around playing wii. I just discovered that you can download games. I didnt know that I could do that or that I could get Super Mario 3!!!!!!! I am almost shitting myself. I gots to gets me to the store tomorrow to get a points card.
A friend of ours who moved to the Camrose area this fall sent us a care package of Ikea meatball sauce today. How fucking sweet is that?
Anyway, I'll fill u all in on the family drama tomorrow. Have a good weekend.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

yo yo mama

What a fucking fucked up day. Seriously, fucked up to the max, as Josie Cotton and gang would have said 25 years ago, on their way to the Galleria for leg warmers and a Tab. Long story I won't get into here, but some family shit is going on, and someone feels I have been too harsh with someone and is devastated, and it just gets stupider, so whatever. Our friends Sebastian and.... fuck if I remember what the hell I called her on here - let's call her Dorothy, just because - also are having a fucked up week and we are babysitting for them today and tomorrow because there is drama in their babysitter world, so after work we all sat around and said "LETS GET DRUNK!" but alas, that can't really happen when you have a bunch of little people. Of course, that isn't stopping me from enjoying a tupperware glass of wine now, but every sip I take reminds me of my diet failing. I was so fucking hot looking at Xmas, and now the pants are getting tight. I need to get back to it asap, but it's been one of those weeks, so let me eat and drink all I want.
Anyway, the wife is up now, so we will watch survivor. I'll finish this later.
peace out, dudes.

Monday, February 09, 2009


This is what the aztec calendar mentioned below sort of looked like - freaky ass shit!

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Aztec calendars and the JT/FM Project

Hey Chunks, if Derwood really loves you, he'll take you here:
Rosanne Cash filled me in on this one, and they loved it. No, she didn't tell me PERSONALLY about it, but mentioned it on her blog as her favorite vacation. C'mon Chunks, you people in Alberta are shitting coins! Go to the islands!
My other suggestion is spending it in a cabin at Prince Albert National Park. If you agree to do that, I promise you I will get myself ordained to do weddings, and I'll remarry you two. I am not joking.
I am very, hugely, insanely angry at my nephew right now, but I will cogitate on this for now before I post anything. Let me just say it involves my father and money and I think I will go to a lawyer this week. Stay tuned.
Grammies are on right now and I don't know anybody. Who the fuck is Adele? Or Duffy? And the Jones Brothers played with Stevie Wonder?? I know them from Camp Rock - I sort of thought they were just for the Disney pre-teen set. Freaky shit. I remember my favorite grammy moments. I remember back in 81 or 82 or something and seeing the Human League and being so fucking excited I couldn't stand it. I frigging loved that British dance synth glam make up look and sound.... I also will NEVER forget the Eurythmics doing Sweet Dreams, and Annie was gussied up as Elvis. It sort of made me throw up in my mouth a bit because androgynous women sort of creep me out, but I was floored by it. I also remember them doing, another year, "Here comes the rain again". I will never forget Madonna and the Like a Virgin opening in the wedding dress. OMG I thought that was risque. I have no Prince memories, which freaks me out, because he was my favorite male artist forever. Did I ever mention how Purple Rain used to make me fucking cry whenever I listened to it? I was such a freaky-ass weird pussy nutcase, wasn't I? Anyway, it still brings something out in me.
I loved when Ellen hosted and Alanis was on that year and Ellen was saying she was singing Alanis and her mother was all "you did WHAT in a theatre?" And that same year Joni won for album of the year or some such shit, and that was so cool. That was in 95 or so. 96 I think. And I remember Natalie Cole winning all that shit and making Rachel buy me "Unforgettable" for Xmas, and you know, I've never listened to it more than once, because I hated that shit. But I had to have it.
What I really loved - WHOIOOO HOOOOO, ALISON AND PLANT WON!!!!!! - Did I ever mention my love for both of them? - Anyway, my favorite grammy moment had to be Bob Dylan when Soybomb came on and danced next to him and I thought it was part of the act. I remember talking to Margo on the phone in Cowtown at the time and we were both "oh, fucking SOYBOMB, this is so pretentious" and then we found out he was just some freak sneaking on the stage to dance. Oh, God love that crazy bastard. We need more Soybombs, spreading the word of love and joy written on their pot bellies, for the world to see. VIVA LA VIDA!
Something about Jamie Fox just annoys the living shit out of me.
What the hell IS the big deal about Mary J. Blige? I don't understand why everyone thinks she's so frigging wonderful. And I hate to say it, but I wouldn't fucking get out of my car if it was full of wasps to let Kanye West in to fumigate it - I just can't stand him. He's just an arrogant retard. Sorry Rosie O'Donnell - I know you think he shits roses, but he's just a bastard. And sorry to his deceased mother Donda, because I know she was mightly proud of her boy, but even though I can feel sympathy as an orphaned son like Kanye, well, Donda, I still think he's just full of shit and swagger and negativity. Rap about love and peace and leave the fucking bling at home, douchebag.
LOLOLOLOL, I am a might cranky tonight. Right now some pregnant rapping woman is prancing around. This ain't fucking music. I hope everyone downloads this shit for free because, bitches, it ain't really any good.
I just finished reading the Don Felder book about being in the Eagles, and it makes me feel better for not buying tickets. They added a THIRD Saskatoon show, and I could have had 28th row floor seats but refused them when I was going to enter my credit card, because they were over 200 dollars each. Fuck you Don Henley and Glen Frey. It should be about loving the fans and the music and each other, but you all just want to fill your pockets, and you all hate each other, so fuck you. I'll save my money.
LOL, Ok, watch, someone will offer me a ticket and I'll be there, but right now I am ok with not going. The book could have been a lot better, but whatever. I always knew Henley, who I actually frigging love, and the band, who I LOVE LOVE LOVE, were all sort of asses, but I remember reading that book by those hookers "You'll Never Make Love in this Town Again" and they said nice things about most of their celeb clients, EXCEPT for Mr. Henley, who they said was saddistic and cruel. They said he always wanted a group of girls and he'd line them up and just bang one, then go down the line, and he was just an ignorant dickhead. And then I think about the stories of him knocking up Stevie Nicks and convincing her to have an abortion and I want to beat the shit out of him. That's the story - he got her to have an abortion and she wrote "Sara" because she was convinced the baby was a girl. Now I can't listen to that one without bawling. Same like I can't listen to "Gyspy" or "Nightbird" because she wrote those about her best friend Robin Anderson who died from leukemia, just like my mom. Hey, y'all should write to the FM people for me and say some sad story about that and get me tickets to Edmonton or Calgary , because Nightbird and Gyspy are my therapy. You know, it's crazy enough to work. Get on it, and I'll owe y'all for life. Hell, I'll get ordained and marry all y'all. Remember to tell them I've been a fan since age 6 and own every FM album. Anyway, those songs are my therapy. I listen to them and try not to cry. I listen to both and think of my mom, who died of the same disease, and know that Stevie wrote from that experience, and I weep like I am some freakshow on a Mexican soap opera. Anyway, score me seats and I'll blog everyday for life.
So anyway, Sugarland is singing with this Adele person now. I love this Sugarland song. Have you ever seen the video for "Stay"? Youtube it. That makes me choke up too. I dunno where the hell I'm hiding the ovaries.
But damn this song makes me sad. And this Sugarland chick is so damn good. Now, where is this Adele bitch they speak of? Oh, the hell with her, who cares..... but she's almost done the song, and this Adele isn't on stage yet. Maybe I heard wrong about Adele. The tv is so quiet because my sweet baby boy is sleeping, and he's either sick or having a reaction to his needle, so let's just say he's fevered and cranky. OMG, he's so damn cute and sweet and he's been the biggest blessing and makes the past year bearable and livable, and just like the others, makes me have hope for this world. Child #3 is a daddy's girl now too, so I am so blessed. Oh man, if I could win just the amount that Margo's mom did in the lotto, the 250 grand, there would be baby #5 in 9 months.
Oh, here is Adele singing with the Sugarland woman now. I still don't know this Adele lady.
I've been having the stupidest dreams lately. I had one about this old coworker last night - we were going to a party together and I thought I was dressed all nice, until I looked down and saw that my pants were short and I was wearing white sweat socks and Birkenstalks.... wtf that means, I don't know. I just found out that this ex-coworker, who is all mother-goose-ish and in her early 50s and seems sort of, kinda square, is actually a big pothead. She's a grandma. And I always feel sort of judgmental. It's weird. I don't want to be, but I sort of am. And then I keep thinking 'where the fuck does she buy the dope'? Like, how does a "respectable" mid 50's grandma just call up some gansta homeboy and say "bitch, I am jonesing for a dimebag!" Like, seriously, I don't get it. It's been almost 20 years since I've smoked the ganj - the last two times made me so paranoid. The second last time, it was nuts. I was so high I remember we were driving on this cresent and I thought we were on a racetrack ,and we were listening to "Flesh for Fantasy" and this girl who we were with who wasn't high but kept asking us if we could get her some, kept saying "FLESH... FLESH... FLESH..." during the song and I couldn't stop laughing, but then we went for coffee and saw Margo and "the whore" and HER FUCKING MOTHER and I was so high and the first thing the mom says is "your eyes are so red, are you stoned"? as a joke and I freaked the fuck out and ran out of the restaurant and down the street and the road was rolling and I kept saying "OMG this shit must be laced with ACID!" and it was hideous. That was actually the beginning of the panic attack stage for me. I trace it to that night. Then I stayed off the evil weed for months until my friends made me do it one more time and I got all paranoid again and we were at someone's house, and they were Indians and had this tapestry of an Aztec or Mayan calendar - all I remember is that it had this creepy face with a tongue sticking out in the centre, and I felt panicky UNLESS I was staring at the face in the calendar all night, so I just responded to the conversations going on by staring at the calendar. And that's when I said enough of this shit. I still wonder, though, what effect it would have now. I need a laugh now and then......
anyway, this is enough babble for one night. I love ya all - now get writing to the FM and Stevie people about your poor orphaned friend with all the kids and the mother who succumbed to the leukemia, who wanted her boy to see Stevie and company, in the name of Robin...
Oh I am such a whore, I don't know how I sleep at night.........

Thursday, February 05, 2009


Hey, I think this was it!!!!!! (If you don't know what I am talking about, read the previous post!):
"May the Sacred Heart of Jesus be Adored, Glorified, Loved & Preserved throughout the world, now & forever. Sacred Heart of Jesus, please pray for me. Saint Jude, Worker of Miracles, please pray for me. Saint Jude, Helper of the Hopeless, please pray for me. Amen."

There was a part after that to promise to publish it. Here it is, PUBLISHED!

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Random bullshit

Well, on Facebook, the "25 random things about me" thing is circulating, but I don't have the energy for that, so I am just going to do some stream-of-consciousness type of random things about me and things I wonder about.

Lately, I can't get the question of what makes the wind blow out of my head. Wait... I mean, I keep wondering what makes the wind blow - not what makes the wind blow OUT OF MY HEAD. Just had to clarify. Like, I was watching the weather channel the other day, and the wind was 0, so I assume it was still as a churchmouse hiding from a cat. However, the next day, it was blowing like crazy, and I started thinking "what makes the wind blow"? Why is it one direction one day and another direction another day? Why is it a light breeze sometimes and a gale-force wind another time? We had an Alberta clipper come through a while ago, and bitch, that was nasty. So... what makes the wind blow? It boggles my fucking mind.

I am also puzzled about earwax - my kids ALWAYS have plugged ears, making it almost impossible to see if they have ear infections. What exactly is ear wax made of, what makes theirs so hard, and why do some people never have to worry about it? Boggles the fucking mind again.

Why do I poop before 10 each morning at work, but on weekends, I am plugged up like my colon has been zipped shut?

Why do people eat blue cheese when it smells like vomit?

Why does some people's BO smell like curry (when they aren't curry eaters?)

Why do manufacturers try to blend two scents together (I think I ranted about this on here before, but it's my blog and I'll repeat myself if I want to) - like why "vanilla lavender" in Downey? Why not just plain lavender?

Why do I love the scent of lavender so much? The Mrs. always makes fun of me because I love it so much, and she said one day "oooh, the manly scent of lavender in the house again" after I used some bath shit or something, and then she went on and on, going "Oh, JT had all his friends over, and the whole house stunk like lavender". But then right after that, we saw some special or something on scents, and apparently, the smell of lavender makes men horny or something, although I wouldn't say that it does that to me. I just probably have some childhood memory or something of it, because, you know me, I just repeat the past over and over.

Ok, sexual content coming up, so please, if you are a prude, please stop now, because I don't want to offend.
Ok, you were warned. My darling Mrs. was watching the Doctors one day, and they said men think of sex every 52 seconds, and that amazed her. So for days, she would just go "right now? What are you thinking of right now? Is it now?" And then she was all "you poor things.... how do you get anything done?" Anyway, I guess I need to clarify that we aren't thinking of hot, horny sex every 52 seconds, but sex does cross the mind constantly. And for some reason, I had the stupidest thing cross my mind the other day. It involves Oprah. Don't say I didn't give you the chance to quit reading. Anyway. Bitch was on or something and I just thought, "I bet Oprah hasn't given a blow job for a good 20 years." Now, the fact that this crossed my mind is a frightening testament to the 52 second extravaganza, but really, I am convinced it's true. Back in the day, when she was safe and fun and big and dressed like a female Cliff Huxtable, complete with yellow triangle earrings, I bet she was going down on Steadman like nobody's business. But then she lost the weight with old Bob, on and off, and got all self-helpy, and Gail left her hubby, and whatever, and I just know that she stopped seeing lil' Stead at eye-level, and indeed, I can hear her rambling to Gail on the phone in a tearful, self-absorbed voice, about how she just can't do that anymore because in doing so, she is sacrificing the woman in her soul, or some such bullshit. She'd be all "I had an 'a-ha' moment about how my soul was robbed each time I placed his penis in my mouth, and I refuse to play those power games anymore. I know why the caged bird sings." And Gail, since she knows which side her toast is buttered on, would be all "mmmm hmmmm, girl, say it" on the phone, whilst she's going down on Shemar Moore. Dr. Angelou would be all "the benediction of the woman who realizes her sensual power but knows how to restrain it frees the inner slave" or some such bullshit, and Oprah would be vindicated. Of course, Oprah would also soon stop allowing Steadman to go down on her, because she wouldn't want to be that vulnerable to man, choosing to please herself. So, I imagine Oprah now just does a swift, fast clitoral stimulation thing that lasts 14 seconds, but which she thinks is empowering. Now, this may all be a pile of bullshit, but I bet it's true. And again, why I thought of this may sound disturbing to you, but I blame it on the 52 second thing.

What other random things can I post about? OH, I know! This is sad. You know how Catholics are big on their novenas? And you know how in the classifieds you will see something from time to time thanking St. Jude or whatever? Well, one time I actually did a novena. I am not kidding you. I said it for 9 days, and I swear to God, it came true. But you know how you are supposed to promise to publish it after it comes true? I never did. I better find one and post it, just so that doesn't bother me. Isn't that so weird of me? But I swear, I said this prayer for 9 days, and it came true. Don't ever underestimate the power of prayer people. But I better find the novena and post it since it was like almost a decade since I did it.

I hate when musicians take themselves too seriously. Like did I tell you how I bought the new Killers album the day it was released? I bought it based on my love for "When you were young", from "Sam's Town", but I was so disappointed with this one. I do admit that I find "Human" sort of catchy, but I'll be fucking damned if I am going to sing "Are we human? Or are we dancer" out loud. What a pile of self-indulgent bullshit those lyrics are.

I dreamed again the other night I was smoking Export A Medium. Please, tell me, it's normal to still dream of smoking almost 7 years later. Please.

When I poop in the staff bathroom at work, I'll turn the tap on full-blast before I spray the glade, even though I know it smells like someone shit in a rosebush when I leave.

I always found Mrs. Huxtable to be a complete bitch as a mother.

Why is it that when you drink an XL Tim Horton's, your piss smells like coffee?

What the fuck is Jet Dry made of, anyway?

Why do I want a 5th child? What does that mean?

Am I delusional to think, at almost 39 years old, that I will someday be close friends with Stevie Nicks? Does that make me crazy?

Ok, I think I've shared too much, yet again. But don't ever say you want me to blog if you don't want to hear me uncensored.

Peace out, biotches. Word to your muthas.

Non funny update on whatever

OK, it’s been a while, but life has been crazy. I had good intentions of posting all through the holidays, but that went out the window, and then I thought I would get to it in January, but that didn’t happen either. The stupid thing is, now I can’t even remember anything I wanted to say since it’s been so long, so I don’t even know how to recap the holidays. Anyway, they weren’t bad. I was d ieting like crazy and hit my target weight on Xmas Eve of what I wanted to be down to on Christmas, so that was good, and I even fit into this Hollister hoodie I’ve never worn because I couldn’t fit it, so it was a great feeling. Then on Christmas Eve evening, I started eating and drinking and didn’t stop for a couple of weeks. I am actually only about 5 lbs up from then, but I reeeeally feel it. I have to get back on track. Like Oprah, this is my year… hahahahahahahahahaha! Oh good one, Opie! Anyway, I haven’t exercised really since the holidays, but I will get back on the wagon.
So for Christmas, my darling Rachel bought me an actual ipod. I was happy with my Creative Zen, but the ipod is like 120 GB, and so I figured that I could theoretically put all our cds onto it. Well, first off, an ipod is a lot less user friendly than the Creative Zen, I’ll tell you that much. It took me ages and ages to figure out how the stupid thing worked. Like, I didn’t KNOW that you “rolled” the controls like a dial. I thought you clicked everything and couldn’t get it to do anything. I also didn’t know how to control the volume, and I still don’t know if there is a shut off switch somewhere. Of course, the instructors suck – all you get is some stupid diagram that tells you how to plug it in and then it instructs you to go to the Help section in itunes. Well, that is about as helpful as having Bill Clinton teaching chastity lessons. I finally had to google “how do you control the volume on an ipod” to figure it out. THEN, the kids got an ipod for Xmas and I loaded their music on before xmas, but it imported all MY music on my computer to their ipod. WELL. With my Creative Zen (it sounds like I am getting a kickback from them, doesn’t it?), all you do is click on a track and hit delete and voila, that stank is gone. However, I couldn’t figure out how to get all my Boz Scaggs Greatest Hits off their ipod. Also, they wanted something added to it, but then I knew that as soon as I hit sync, all the stuff I started putting in itunes would go on theirs (this is after I got mine and started to try to put all my cds in there). So, again, I was up until 2:30 one night trying to figure it out and I again had to google it to figure out how. I think I have that figured out now, anyway. Anyway, I started to be selective and only add stuff I knew I would want, instead of whole albums, but that is proving to take so long I am either just skipping complete albums or importing entire cds I’ll never listen to. For example, the Mrs. apparently has these old Roxette cds and I hate them, but there was one or two songs I thought wouldn’t be bad, but I just don’t have the time to piss around and find the songs and yada yada so I just thought I could live without it altogether. Conversely, I have a Mighty, Mighty Bosstones cd which has some song I apparently loved once upon a time but I’ve honestly never listened to the rest of the album before, but I just imported the whole thing because it was just easier. I am maybe 65% done putting my cds on there. I also fell in love with the itunes store, which is dangerous, and then I discovered, which is even better, and I spent some money there putting on cds I own but are either damaged or missing, and it’s a good deal. The discs from my Elton John boxed set are all scratched, so I just bought them, all 4 discs, on puretracks, for 10 bucks. I also found two songs I’ve never been able to find on limewire before – “That’s not the way it’s s’posed to be” by Anne Murray (don’t laugh, it’s non-country and good) and Donna Summer’s remake of “There goes my Baby” AND Benjamin Orr’s “Too Hot to Stop.” So yeah, that’s dominated my time.
We also bought a stereo with a docking station, but it’s sort of wrecked so we have to take it back but I am just too lazy to at the moment. We also got the kids a wii for Xmas and that is so much damn fun. We bought RockBand 2 over the holidays and it’s addictive, although I completely suck at it. It also annoys me that you have to “Earn” the songs. Whatever. I can’t wait until I get to “Go Your Own Way” and “Alex Chilton”.
And what else…. I was pretty good at Xmas, but fell apart over New Years and the first 2 weeks of January. Seriously, I think it’s like posttraumatic stress, you know that? I think because it was just go-go-go when mom was sick and when she died that I just couldn’t process. Like I was balancing a new baby and traveling to Saskatoon to see mom almost every day and then her dying so abruptly, and then leaving town and going back to work and then her funeral right after that and writing the tribute and then into my busy work time and busy kid time, and Xmas and all of that…. Well, the whole chain of events kept coming back to me and I was just a wreck. So anyway, I seem to be ok again now, for the most part, but from about New Years day until around the middle of January, I was thinking I needed help because it was just so painful. Anyway, enough about that, because I hate wallowing. It didn’t help that I had strep throat over Xmas, so of course that made me weak and tired and probably more susceptible to carrying on.
What else… what else….. oh, so we also embarked on painting the entire upstairs of our house. I was reluctant because I was in love with my dark terracotta color, because I thought it made the house look classy and New Mexico like, but my wife was sick of it and wanted to lighten it up, so we painted it this color called Pyramid, and I didn’t like it at first, but now I think I do. It will be really nice once we get accents in, like new furniture and stuff – we want dark brown as the accent color.
So yeah, that’s what we’ve been busy with. I am sure there is much more, but that’s the roundabout bit for now. I can fill in the blanks later. Anyway, talk soon, all y’all…