Rows and Flows of Angel Hair, and a Prince CD with no Swears, and Erika Sleak with Big Hair, I've written my Blog that way....

Good Eeeevening... well, I am sort of recovered from seeing Joni in the flesh. One observation - she didn't curtsey to the queen when she shook her hand. Also, people are sort of in an uproar that Joni's tribute was the climax of this thing that cost 2.6 million dollars to put on, and 3 years to plan, and Joni didn't even say anything - it came out all wrong. I admit, I bitched about it to the Joni list too, but you know, she's Joni, so whatever. I was all weepy just seeing her up close. God, I just want to meet her one more time, just dinner is all I ask - any ideas how to make it happen? I could get the best fucking interview out of her.... ah well. Love my Joan. Pissed off at her, yes, but whatever.
Watching the Daytime Emmys right now, and since I don't know anyone anymore, it's so boring. This fucking pukoid won from Y and R, this young punk for best young actor and he was so fucking cocky and told this stupid little thing, I almost spit. Erika Slezak just won for the upteenth time. I have no idea what show she is on. Yup, can't find the remote again.
So I was listening to Prince today and thought of a funny story. You ever get shafted when you buy something? Well, I did, and it involved Prince. Now, I love the purple dude - I will never, ever forget the first time I heard "When Doves Cry" - one of those moments you never forget - the hair on the back of my neck stood up and I remember thinking "what is this?!?!?!?" Anyway, I was in university and of course was enrolled in Columbia House many times in many different names. Well, I loved the song "Sexy MF" which of course went "You sexy motherfucker!" Well, I ordered the damn disc, and was so excited when it came, but it was some stupid edited version and when I put it on, the song went like this: "You sexy mother - OW!" It was indeed the stupidest thing I ever heard. So, buyer beware of edited versions....
Hey, Bill Bell died - I didn't know that. Is Cricket still on that show of his?
So anyway, another funny moment to recall from last night. Shirley Douglas, Keifer Sutherland's Mama and Tommy Douglas's daughter, was on stage and was doing this thing talking about her dad and shit, and she's all dramatic and booming voiced and I kept thinking "she sounds like Liz Taylor when she was all pilled up at the Golden Globes" and then she pulls a Liz - she starts saying something like "there are 34 people who are still alive who were alive when the province was incorporated" or something, and then she sweeps her hands in this big dramatic gesture, and yells "THEY'RE OVER THERE!" and points across the arena. Well, so everyone turns around and nobody has any idea who she is pointing to, or where she is pointing, and I just lost it.
Hey, has anyone noticed that McDonalds ain't "Fast Food" anymore, in that the service is so fucking slow, you could have cooked a goddamn turkey by the time your food arrives? Tonight we were out buying bedding plants and shit (I don't want to say how much we spent), and Keryn wanted McDonalds so we relented. We went to the one by our house, thinking it would be less busy, and so we get there and the kids and Rachel sit outside and I go in to order... Well, I am in line at LEAST 10 minutes and then get up there, and it takes 10 minutes to get the damn food. So I order the whole wheat chicken mcgrill, and the woman seems not to know what the hell I am talking about, and I instinctively thought "she will fuck this up, get a salad as a backup because you won't want to get in line again if this is wrong". They got Keryn's drink wrong too, and whatever, and I finally get outside and sure enough, it's not the whole wheat thingy, it's this thing on a white bun with all this mayo on it, so I just chucked it out and ate the fucking salad. Oh man, I was so mad.
Hey Margo, just saw Ricky Dean Goldin, remember, he was on Another World - that annoying singer who was with Jenna the virgin... what the hell was his character's name? He was also on Kate and Allie, playing the dude who Jenny dated and slept with. Yes, yet again, Jenny got all the action - the boyfriend, sex.... while my Emma just sat there alone with no storyline. No wonder she quit. Fucking Jenny reminded me too much of Debby Gibson. But anyway, Ricky Paul or Dean or whatever looks like Christian Slater or something. It freaked me out.
OMG, did you all see the OTHER new reality show, the one with all the 80's bands trying out in this competition to revive their careers - NBC, "Hit Me Baby One More Time". It is the stupidest looking thing ever, but of course, you know me and the 80's, I'll be watching, 80's whore that I am. But this "I want to be a Hilton" thing - it really does demonstrate that the world is coming to an end, doesn't it? That mother Hilton - have you seen a bigger bitch?
Oh, and Average Joe will be on again this summer - that offends me almost as much as that stupid show with Carolyn Rhea and the fat people.
Anyway, I am rambling and saying nothing of anything tonight, so I will put y'all out of your misery now. Hope y'all have a great long weekend!
The post is now over y'all y'all y'all - the old people ARE OVER THERE!!
xo
JT