ain't nothing wrong with point form, mofos.

point form shite:

-- still don't know what to do re: the trip. They are closing a shitload of schools in California this week for precaution. I dunno. If I had a crapload of money, I would just do it, but if I am sacrificing money that I could use for other things on a trip that may be veiled in illness, well, I need to think it through. Readers, send money asap.

-- Have to poop but just sort of ignoring it. Weird when a night poop comes. Of course, tomorrow I'll be bunged up and cranky.

-- Sweating like fucking Star Jones in a bakery. Combo of the little bit of sun I got today (not used to temps in the 20s) and the glass of wine I just poured. It was a crazy day, so I deserve vino.

-- The whole family was wickedly crabby today. Baby boy woke up before 7, crying and wailing, and was hideously unhappy until almost 10. Second day in a row for that. Pretty sure it's the teething. Top two are coming in and he's got rash on his chin and diaper rash so bad he was bleeding on the bum last night, profusely. Horrible. Poor guy. Anyway, the housework hasn't been caught up for a month because we've had dance festivals and sick kids and such, and so since we are so compulsive and weird, it has stressed us out, and Rachel and I were bitchy with each other and the kids, and the kids are overtired and catching colds and they were on edge and there was yelling and drama and whatever, but now I think we are all ok. I hate when we have days like that. Of course, it was so beautiful out, and I kept singing in my head the words to my favorite Cheryl Wheeler song "Driving Home" - "Slow down, what's the hurry/ there's no rush today/ there won't be too many days like today" - Cheryl Wheeler is da bomb! But don't buy her albums (sorry Cheryl) online - Please, humor me, and order (from somewhere, I dunno where) her concert video... .I can't remember what it's called, but ask me and I'll think... anyway, she opens with that song, and it's so beautiful - her cds are too..... polished. Anyway, she's like the American Jann Arden - a hillariously funny singer, a lesbian (I actually don't even think Jann is one anymore, but whatever), and she's just wonderful. GET THAT VIDEO. It makes me laugh and cry.

-- Another man I know used the word luscious today, and I found it so funny, because that's such a feminine word.

-- I'm really grieving again. I hate mentioning it again, because I know all y'all are thinking "for fuck's sake, it's been 9 months" or whatever, but I am really, really sad lately, thinking about my mom. I have regrets. People with parents, call them or hug them or something. Just fucking do it, ok?

-- Drama with my dad's old folks home - long story. My sister kept calling me to tell me the updates. It's so hard to know what's truth when my dad is so Alzheimer-ey.

-- Really wish I wouldn't have held back the poop - I'll pay for it tomorrow.

-- Itchy as fucking hell because I shaved tonight - haven't shaved since like last Tuesday and looked like Don Johnson, and apparently some whiskers ended up falling onto my neck or something. Anyway, feels like I have neck crabs or something.

-- I am sad the black girls are gone on Amazing Race, but let me just say this: Sister, you should have just pissed yourself. I would have. Fuck, I mean, it's not like pooping - peeing isn't as shameful. I would have just pissed my pants and sailed onto the million.
Margie and Luke annoyed me tonight, for the first time. I don't know why. Tammy and Victor are really growing on me, but I think it was unfair that they got to speak Chinese.... But yeah, I like them. My daughter came home the other day and said the "Chinese/Japanese/look at these" thing - her cousin taught her. I didn't know what the hell to say. I'm really dreading the menstruating years, because the moods and the loss of innocence and such will be such a downer. That's why I want to do Disney now, when it's still magical. I'm sure all those migrants will be swabbing the rides down each day with frigging Purell, right?

-- My neighbor mentioned yesterday, as I was weeding my fucking flowerbed that runs the length of my house (and is full of perrenials and bushes) that our cat looks old. My cat loves him to pieces and visits him in an almost obsessive way - she'll see him and jump on his shoulder immediately, or will run into their house and hang out for the afternoon - anyway, we were chatting and I mentioned "Sally" and he said "she's looking old this year, JT-ey" and I was sort of struck dumb because she IS - and she's 11 this year. And she loves me more than life itself. Every night, I fight her off repeatedly because she wants to sleep on me, and all night she on me, purring loudly. This morning, she was so excited to see me, she bit my elbow as I reached down to pet her - it's a freaky kind of love. I dunno if she's even in the house right now. ANyway, I am now mourning her already because it just sunk in how old she is. Fuck, if some motherfucking TURTLES, who fucking ooze salmonella, can live 300 years, why cant a cat live a good 60 or 70? SOn of a fucking bitch! Anyway, we almost lost her when she was 4, because she had a freak disease and almost died - spent a week in the cat hospital - and let me tell you, I had to call in sick for DAYS because I cried like a fucking mental patient. Fuck, I cried like some bitch who said "luscious" over and over.

-- I keep thinking of my Aunt Kay, who died about 30 years ago. Kay was almost my dad's only cousin. He had 3 cousins - Kay, her brother Sam, or something, and MARY. Mary lived in Canada, an immigrant from "the old country", who spoke broken English all her life, and had no kids, and was married to John, who was from Poland, but who spoke better English. He had some sort of prostate cancer or something, so they didn't have kids and didn't have relations (separate bedrooms even). Both had stifling BO. Mary was so sweet, and had a little beard, and loved to drink. They'd go to bed at 8 at night and rise at 5, so when we'd stay with them in Kelowna, it was always a long night. I'd be on the couch, and at 5, she'd be up cooking breakfast ( or "breaky" as my mom would say) and she'd be taking swings of rye from the fridge "for Mary's COUGH" as she'd say, and whatever, but we all loved her dearly. Dad's other cousin (dad's parents were from the old country and i need to tell that story sometime, but he only had 3 cousins is all you need to know now) Kay (her brother Sam I never knew) lived in Pittsburgh and came to visit when I was 8 or 9 - I didn't know her from Adam really. We met her in Calgary that summer, and her hubby Frank was Italian. I was literally obsessed with Italy - one of those stupid JT things, but I was obsessed - and I remember they made us traditional bowtie pasta with sauce and red wine. ANyway, they came to see us in our town in BC and Kay was a cancer survivor. Well, she took us all shopping and said she wanted to buy us something to remember her by. I really wanted Donna Summer's double album "Live and More" and she kept saying "you won't remember me with a record" but I held strong and she bought it, and lo and behold I still think of her when I hear Donna Summer. Kay was wonderful, as was her hubby Frank. Anyway, she sent all of us pictures of her and Frank. And then the next year her cancer came back and she told us to look at the picture and we'd see the lump in her neck. I am still haunted by that, 30 years later. I want to curl up and go back in time and just hug everyone. For those of you who believe in Heaven, do you think that's what it will be like?

-- whew, the cat's in the house, waiting for me to go to bed. Thank goodness she's with me for another day.

-- ANyway, 1 am on a worknight. Not a good way to start the week, especially since I'll be bunged up. ATTENTION, JT - Merde when the opportunity is presented to you!

-- Seacrest out.