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Ho-Hum... I am so exhausted right now, as usual, so why the hell am I sitting here when I have sweet bugger all to say? Ah, ancient Chinese secret, I suppose.
Nothing much to report - fighting this stupid cold, which is taking the wind out of my sails. Ah, I must be getting old if I am using expressions like that. Indeed, I am in fact getting old. It's my 36th birthday on Saturday, and it sort of freaks me out to be that old. I really do feel like I am still some pre-teen, waiting to be tucked into bed at night. Will I ever feel like a grown up? Why don't I? I still can't fathom that I am not a kid, and that more and more years go by between my actual childhood and my memories. It's so strange, this getting older business. I still look really young, so that's a good thing, I guess. I was told by this woman who cut my hair last week that I didn't look 30 yet, but then the bitch says right after "Oh yeah, you got the gray hair coming." I still remember making fun of Ann Romano on One Day at a Time when she threw a hissy fit because she was 36 and in between the "Damnit Julie" interludes she'd always yell, she was thrashing around and laughing and weeping that she was 36. "Shut the fuck up" I'd yell that that drama queen in my head, but maybe the bitch was right - how the hell did I to 36 so fast? Ah, I need to stop bellyaching, don't I? Someone give me a swift kick in the arse, won't you?
So anyway, not a whole hell of a lot to say, as I said already. Funny thing yesterday, which shows how horrible of a person I am. I was in Sobeys looking for a nice steak to BBQ, and who do I run into but this woman I've known forever, who is crazier than me even, named, oh, let's call her Judy. Well, "Judy" and I always seem to run into each other grocery shopping and we always blurt out these stupid things - case in point. Like 20 years ago, Margo and I were having coffee and in walks Judy and her friend, and they sat sort of next to us, but I didn't know they were there. Then, suddenly, I hear this gruff voice yell, "Hey prettyboy, wanna fuck?" Well, maybe you had to be there, but it was damn funny. Well, anyway, we still do stupid stuff like that, and so she says to me when she sees me yesterday "HEYYY, When did you get out of rehab?!?" which is one we've done before. We've pretended to be divorced people fighting over jewelry before too... ah, it just shows we are nuts. Anyway, I pointed out that I wanted to buy this particular T-Bone, but the damn thing was priced $6.66, and of course, I didn't want any satanic meat on my table, so it was a big debate if I should buy it or not. Well, she says "hey, check out how much my roasts cost" and she had this club pack of three beef roasts in her cart and the price said "$.09" - yes, that is correct - nine fucking cents. Well, I thought this was so funny and told her she had to try to get away with it. So she emails me at work today and says she got it through the till, and just had her hand on the keypad to pay by debit, and the frigging bagger lady yells "these roasts cost nine cents!?!" and the bagger woman is sort of slow and gruff, so then they had to hold the whole line up to price check it, and then the gruff lady carried her groceries out and Judy had to pretend she didn't notice it was priced wrong. I thought the whole story was hilarious, but does it make me a bad person to wish she could have gotten away with the roasts? I mean, the store drives me crazy because they never have sweet fuck all that I want on the shelves, so it would be fun to stick it to them, and I only go there because it's basically next door to my work. Ah, I dunno, maybe I am just a bad person. But it was damn funny.
So Margo asked her coworkers and her lover (LOL, sorry, the term lover is just so hillarious and dramatic - let's all try to slip it into a conversation today) - anyway, she asked Rochelle and her coworkers about the commercial of the old man with the big dick, and they all thought the same thing, that the old fucker was saying he was hung. I am telling you, it is very disturbing. Pretty much as gross as the other commercial that is icky - I've blogged about it before - about the couple reading the paper and then breaking out the KY. I am also quite sick of the whole cheese commercial thing with the people eating and then that old nutso bitch yelling "want your kids to leave home? stop cooking with cheese!!" Like, what dipshit came up with that one? Honest to God, I don't get what they pay these people for. "Oh, I've got one - let's have a grandfather with a stallion's cock sharing a moment with his grandson. Or how about a kooky old raisin trying to get the kids out of the house by not cooking with cheese - it will be the new "Where's the beef" - "don't cook with cheese!" Honestly, it's no suprise these two are Canadian commercials.
So, speaking of Canadian stuff, I forgot to mention that on Chunk's blog a while back, she mentioned the song "Big Hard Sun" by Indio, and it totally brought me back. I LOVED that song, from I dunno, 1989 or so. I just downloaded it tonight. Thanks for the reminder! I am also looking for an obscure Anne Murray song (shut up). Yes, Anne Murray, but there are two Anne songs I fucking love - One is Now and Forever, which I have, but I can't find the other one: "That's Not the way it's s'posed to Be". It's such an awesome song, from about 1984 or so, but I can't find the frigging thing anywhere. Does anyone remember it? I am listening to "All We Are" by Kim Mitchell right now, which I've mentioned before that I love, but well, I am mentioning it again. I think I might have Method of Modern Love out of my head finally, but I can't stop singing a song from the 70s that nobody but me seems to know: "I Go Crazy" by Paul Davis. It is going through my head over and over. Two 80s songs I love are Paul Davis' "Cool Night" and "Boys of Autumn" by.. I dunno, some Canadian. They remind me of each other, those two, and I love them so much. Anyone else like these? Oh God, I can't get rid of "I Go Crazy", which is such a sllllooooow song, and I only know the line "I go crazy, when I look in your eyes... I go crazy...." so it's just that, over and over. At least Method of Modern Love spelled something out.
Hey, and one more song - one of my all-time favorites, the Doobie Brother's "What a Fool Believes". Does ANYONE have ANY idea what in the hell the words are? I realized that I've had the album since I was NINE, and I still make up all the words, mumbo jumbo: "What a fool believes, to be, the ha ba pa of powdah.. to reason the wooord.. keep tellin him some where back in her long ago..." Honest to God, let's piece it together without googling the lyrics.
Well, I guess I should go to bed now since this is a really boring post. I'll jabber at y'all this weekend.
TGIF,
JT