The Weather Network, Sally Jessy, my spastic foot, and an eggy sandwich thrown in for good measure

Ok, well, a tad bit pissy at the moment because I was writing comments like a son of a bitch to Margo's latest post (www.oneneuroticsister.blogspot.com), and then, like the moron that I am, my big Fred Flintstone foot just taps the switch on my computer so I lost it all. So, I will just address a little of what I lost on my blog. She was saying that her nephew listens to Raffi, and my reply was that Keryn had a Sharon Lois and Bram tape, but her alltime favorite was James Taylor's "That's Why I'm Here" cd, especially "Only One". When we went to B.C. when she was one year old, we had to play it over and over the whole way. We were ready to throw the damn thing out of the window by the time the trip was done, but now it's become a sentimental favorite.
Anyway, what was up today... let's see... Started out with Keryn trying to give me breakfast in bed, but I didn't know, so I got up and she was yelling "Daddy, go to bed!" so I went back and the Rach yells, "OMG Kim pooped on the floor, help!" So I had to go and clean up the poop, and her, and then go back to bed and pretend to sleep so Keryn could bring me my "eggy sandwich". LOL, it was so sweet, even though the thought of eggs in the morning usually makes me want to hurl. Then we tried to clean up this hideous disaster, and when that wasn't working, we took the kids outside and did yardwork - got my front lawn raked and the sandbox cleaned up. Then took the kids to Petland and I pretended I was going to buy this Dashound.... LOL, well, I hate making them take the animals out when they know you won't buy them, so I just pretended like it was my life's ambition to have a dashound to love. So, house hasn't been cleaned yet, but maybe tomorrow. It's supposed to rain, so we will most likely be housebound anyway.
Ok, gripe number one: The Weather Network. So Thursday and Friday had been strangely hot. It was 24 and 26 degrees on these days, and the hot spot in Canada was in Sask. both days. Average temp should be like 7 or something. So, that's news, isn't it? You'd think so, but NO, good old Eastern-Centric-Toronto-is-the-center-of-Canada Weather Channel just says, "oh, it was hot in Sask. the past couple days, but look out, it's cooling off, and look, the south west has a snow warning. BUT OH, Ontario, you will feel the heat soon!" and the dude goes on to say how it will be 15 across the province and give the temps for the next week. And so I am sitting here thinking "he said snowfall warning for the southwest - where - how much? when? Then of course, they give the fucking conditions at Pickle Lake, and I mean, who outside of Pickle Lake gives a shit, or knows where Pickle Lake is???? Oh, don't get me started. I mean, we are amidst extreme weather, but no, let's just find out that the ice will soon go off the Lake in Ontario... ARGH. Of course, they do their western bit by showing the always pointless Oga Nbowski in these long frigging clips, walking in Vancouver and marveling at some weather thing and talking to people on the street. And I mean, it's Vancouver. It either rains, or it doesn't. Nothing extreme, so why are they paying Oga the big bucks to report that "the tulips are blooming in February, just like clockwork - what does the man on the street think?" While we sit here on the prairies and get frozen to death or roast to death in the summer, or have 26 degree heat one day, snow in parts the next day, and nobody gives a shit about it. But oh, someone in Ontario farts, and they measure the velocity for the next two weeks.... LOL, sorry, I am all caffeined up again.
Margo suggested that the Whore would be a good candidate for Maury. I totally agree. She really could go on there and be asked "who your baby Daddy?" Hey, actually, the Sally Jessy Raphael show actually contacted these people I know back in the day and REALLY pressured them to come on. I mean, REALLY pressured them. LOLOL, I guess we should have known it was the beginning of the end for the show when they call up some trailer trash in Sask. and try to get them on the show. Now, I know, I sound all snotty and mean when I say "the whore" and "Trailer trash", but really, 2/3 of the parties in the Sally thing really WERE trailer trash. You see, this couple I knew, Hobbes and Vanna, were really dysfunctional - she got knocked up by him when we were in highschool and married him, and then he was friends with spooky Pam, and Vanna thought they were sleeping together, so Hobbes and Pam called Sally and they wanted the three of them to go on the show and take a lie detector that they never slept together. I didn't believe any of this, but my friend Blaire was still friends with Vanna and Hobbes and swore on a 100 Bibles this was all true. LOLOL OMG, it still freaks me out the people that I knew..... Margo, I know you are sitting there scratching your head wondering who I am talking about, but I didn't change Pam's name, so think of the only freaky Pam you know, and then figure out Blaire, Hobbes, and Vanna - easy peasy.
Well, call me Britney Spears, and not because I have man-boobs (really, I don't - I may be rotund, but thankfully, the chest didn't turn all Simon Cowell-y). Call me Britney because oops, I did it again. I just touched the "off" switch with my foot. So, as soon as I realized I hit it, I quickly held my foot in place and then hit "Save draft". You see, they were playing "High School Confidential" by Rough Trade, and I was tapping my foot, of course.... Now the 12 inch of Howard Jones' "New Song" is on.... I thought he was so cool when I was 13.... LOL, I will so be turning this damned thing off again sometime soon.
I had a dream I was smoking. Man, I hope the feeling will totally go away. But in my dream, it was one of those times when you smoke too much and you are all hoarse and phlegmy and feel gross - like after a night of drinking. Hey, my sister Libby's mother in law calls phlegm "fleg-am". She's just so damn cute!
Hey, the Rat book is awesome! It's a must read. Well, if you are into reading about a guy who studies rats in an alley in New York for a year.... which, of course, I am.....
Ok, I am gonna catch up with Jann Arden or something. Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars,
xo
JT