Monday, April 18, 2005

Ne Pas Faire Vomir.

I don't have much to say tonight - honest. The day started off at 7:00 - Kim was crying so I went to her, and usually, I get her back to sleep, and we snuggle until 7:30. Not today - she was crying and I just knew she was sick. Sure enough, she threw up a couple times by 8:00, and Rach stayed home with her. Of course I was panicked, because when Keryn had the flu last time, she got so dehydrated, she ended up in the hospital (on her 3rd birthday no less) for two days. So, I was my usual frantic self, but she ended up feeling pretty good by this afternoon, and played in the backyard with Keryn, who was the concerned big sister: "Oh mommy and daddy, I love my baby sister soooo much!" Of course, I had to do my usual "let's buy the sick child a present" routine, but what do you get a 21 month old, so I bought her Dora, Big Sister, on DVD. It just scares the hell out of me when the kids get sick. I just panic, because there is nothing you can do to take it away or make it all better, and it's just so sad - we all go into that liminal space of the otherworld of illess. I am crossing my fingers that Keryn doesn't follow suit and get it. Of course, you know me - already I've done all the laundry that came in contact with her today on the Heavy Stain cycle, which runs for like 85 minutes... LOL, I sound like such a freak admitting that. I also bleached down the counters, bathrooms, etc. like usual when someone gets a stomach bug, but of course, that usually doesn't do fuck all anyway.
I think I am such a nutcase about the kids getting sick because I have ALWAYS hated to throw up. In fact, I might as well admit here that it was a huge fear, bordering on neurosis, as a child. Ok, I was a really nervous child, and carried the weight of the world on my shoulders. You know, looking back, I really WAS a tad bit OCD. I worried about everything, and always had a nervous stomach, and lived in fear of throwing up. Half the time it was nerves, but that really didn't compute to my childish mind. So I would sneak Rolaids and lay on my right side (becasue I read somewhere that it would calm your stomach) and cross my fingers and pray that I wouldn't puke.
The funny thing is, I have never really been a big puker. Usually as a kid, one a year. Then as a teenager and an adult, almost never. In fact, I remember throwing up from the flu when I was 15, and then, besides 3 self-induced vomits due to drinking, which I don't count, because hell, when you are drunk, you do it, feel better, get something to eat, and get on with your life, I didn't throw up again from real illness for 17 years. That one was a corker. It was right after I quit smoking, and the night before we went to bed with a big bowl of popcorn and watched Big brother and Amazing Race. I woke up sicker than hell the next day, and got up to take a shower. I get to the bathroom and just as I am about to get in the shower, I feel that gross bubbly feeling in my throat, so I yell to Rach "get me a bowl, I'm going to get sick!" (why not the toilet, you ask? Well, because I am obviously crazy, apparently). So she comes in almost excited because she keeps saying "I've never known you to puke!" and I yell at her to get out. So then I throw up, and I am standing there, completely naked, puking in my sink (I dunno what I did with the bowl) and seeing myself in the mirror thinking this was the ugliest sight ever, and between heaves I am saying "No more, no more!" in this gravelly voice. Well, Rach is on the phone at this time, so I hear her saying to her sister "he's saying 'no more, no more'" and she's pissing herself laughing, and well, I admit, it was kinda funny. So then I had to call everyone in the world I knew and say "I threw up, can you believe it?" because everyone knows I am like Jerry Seinfeld, who had that 15 year vomit-free stretch... Yup, it's lucky I can't give birth, because if I can't even throw up without telling the world about it, can you imagine pushing a child out of me? I'd be on drugs forever, like Liz Taylor or Courtney Love.
LOL, ok, this was the stupidest, grossest post, but Margo and I were laughing tonight when I was telling her about Kim being sick and she was saying how she hates to throw up, and how hey, that would be a good blog. LOL, now she's got a story, but she can talk about that one when she wants to.
So I've rattled on, haven't I? Sorry to anyone who might read this, but it's finally my own time, alone time, and i just like to type, and to hell with if it makes any sense or is interesting - I admit, it's pretty hit or miss thus far.
Hey, anyone read the Jann Arden journal? i was looking last night, and holy shit, she was so depressed.... She needs to come here and hit the Winners going-out-of-business sales....
Also, any truth to the rumours that Target is moving to Canada?
OK, one more thing - and this is not meant to be offensive at all, but why the big freakout about choosing the Pope? Like, shouldn't there be one waiting just in case, at all times? Like the Pope in waiting, or an understudy or vice Pope or deputy Pope or something? I'm serious, wouldn't that just be wise to do? i don't get the whole white smoke black smoke thing either. I just dunno.
OK, I guess I should wrap this up since it's so frigging stupid tonight. Y'all might get a break from me tomorrow night - I have to go with my father in law somewhere to pick up a piano - I thought he said a town an hour away. I dunno, they are getting this piano or something, so I have to go help him, and then I am going to hot tub there tomorrow night and they have their outdoor shower hooked up now, which is the cat's ass, so this all indicates that spring is finally here!
Ok, have a good Tuesday,
xo
JT

1 Comments:

At 6:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LMAO>>>>> Once again you had me choking on my beverage... I can just picture you puking into the sink. It brought back rather vivid flashbacks of the 'Southern Comfort' nite.. What do you have against puking in toilets??
YOu wouldn't that nite either.. I think you need help my friend.. lol.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home