Friday, January 29, 2010

TGIF... TGIF like you wouldn't believe. In fact, good-freakin'-bye January - I won't miss you. After a warm month, we got hit with the storm last weekend, and then the bitter cold. We didn't even get hit that bad - apparently, we got 16 cms, while most other places got an entire foot or more. Still, roads are still bad, and since we had 2 days of rain before the snow, it's icy. Work has been crazy, life has been crazy, Rachel's mother was finally released from the hospital last night, so that's great, but up until then, it was still a gong-show roller-coaster of things at the hospital that I am too tired to explain. Let's just say it was the usual - you think things are going right, and then they aren't. But anyway, all is good now. But it was still a stressful week with that, and then in the midst of it, I broke the dryer. Now, I don't know if I whined on here about how one of the reasons I hate January is because I am always broke. I get paid once a month, and we get paid for January well before Xmas, and so by Jan. 1st, I'm already whizzing through my money because of Xmas and post-Xmas stuff. So anyway, the other night, I break the fucking dryer. Or it broke on me. Or something. Rachel was at the hospital, and I was trying to get the house together and do some laundry. Well, I am just about to throw her work uniform (she has to wear a uniform) in the wash, but first I am throwing some clothes from God knows when which I washed twice before going to dry them, into the dryer. I notice that they don't smell like fabric softener, and since it was 30 below, I think they'll get all violently static-y. Then I remember I have one of those new Bounce bars that you put in the dryer on the shelf. So, I go to slide the refill into the thingy in the dryer, and I turn the drum, and it makes this horrible noise. You guessed it. It was instantly buggered up. The damn thing wouldn't tumble. Luckily, I noticed it right away, before the dryer overheated and caught on fire. So then I panic, thinking I need a new dryer and blah blah blah, but long story short, the repair guy came and he told us it was an 11 dollar part, but labor was 90 because he had to come twice, and I was so happy to be getting off with 100 bucks, I didn't care. He also had to clean the whole thing out because the vent wasn't attached to the fan or something, and the entire thing was full of lint - I am talking an entire garbage can of lint. So, really, this probably stopped us from a fire. He vaccuumed it out too, so anyway, it's all good.
But yeah, it's been a crazy, stupid month. And I didn't sleep well last night so I was dozey today and drank waaaay too much coffee and ate too little food, and was jittery as Tiger Woods in divorce court, and ended up at the grocery store at 4:30, sweating and shaking with a double combo of low blood sugar and too much caffeine. Let's just say it was a gong show.
And it's a full moon.
There - the bitching is done. Seriously, I am just glad we made it through the month. And it's light earlier in the morning and later in the evening, so this cold weather isn't even that horrible.
I really should go to bed, but it feels good to just sit. I don't have anything really to say, so I am just going to type and see what happens.
Did anyone watch Idol this week? Man, that Katy Perry sure was an old bitch, wasn't she? I mean, really, if she hadn't of kissed a girl, she wouldn't be jack shit. And Avril? Good LORD. What a creepy little freak she is - I didn't realize she was that odd looking, or that weird. Doogie Howser was great though. Again, I hate to admit it, but I don't even notice that Paula is gone. Stupid bitch. She should have taken what they offered her - it's not like she has anything to fall back on.
My sister brought a whole stack of Star magazines for the older girls - apparently, they told her they like the pictures or something. WELL. I just realized I am even more out of it than I thought. Like, I will finally admit here that I have no idea who this Kardashian woman is. No clue. But apparently, she must be some sort of big deal because she's in all of them. I think she's some reality star, but I don't know. I'd google her, but I really don't care.
And again, I saw Madonna and her plastic surgery. It makes me sad that she did it, because she's so odd in other ways, I didn't think she'd do something like that. I figured it would go against the Kabbalah, or she'd just tie a red string around her crow's feet or something, but I guess not.
And then, whilst taking a rare evening poop tonight, I saw this picture of Sarah Jessica, and she looked.... whats the word.... like some sort of elf or hobbit or sea urchin or something. Really, it was unsettling. Now, I know I am no Willie Aimes, but still......
It's sort of unsettling when your bowel movements fall outside of their regular pattern, hey? An evening poop is just so odd.... kind of like someone flying a kite at night. Odd and unsettling.
So everyone in this entire town seems to be going to Mexico this week. At work, there are 3 people gone right now, and I think a grand total of 5 more going this weekend. So of course I was bitching and whining about wanting to go and yada yada, but that would mean I couldn't do jack shit in the summer, so I should just shut up. And I mean, you all know what would happen if we went. First, I would have a royal panic attack in the plane and they'd have to emergency land in some horrible place to make sure I wasn't croaking, and then we'd get there, and my room would be full of bedbugs and lizzards, and I would get the shits and start puking the second we landed and one or two of the kids would follow suit, and we'd all be wearing diapers and trying to buy saltines on the blackmarket. Then, on day 4, when we'd all be better, someone would get an awful sunburn and blister and someone would knock a tooth out on a waterslide, and I'd go to the pharmacy to buy some black-market drugs and I'd get sucked into trying Viagra and would get that painful 4 hour erection they talk about and have to have emergency prostate surgery in a dirty Mexican clinic, and then rebels would storm the hotel right before a hurricane hit. So I should just be happy to be here.
Oh, I was watching House Hunters International tonight, and Suzanne Whang WASN'T the host! It was some other woman, and the people didn't even BUY a property. It was just so wrong on so many levels.
I guess I should get to bed. I am rereading one of Augusten's books for something to do. You know, as much as I like him, I really, REALLY get sick of hearing about his fucking dogs. He spends way too much time writing about them. I'd rather hear about midgets.
Anyway, happy Sat. peeps. Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars......

1 Comments:

At 9:26 AM, Anonymous Rox said...

I'm a morning pooper too. This whole having to drive my kid to town for band thing is ruining my poop mojo though. Oy.

You really need to change your info thing. I mean dude, you are NOT 36 anymore and you have FOUR babies. :o) I also have a feeling you're leaving it like that to make me insane because you know it's just the type of thing to make me cuckoo. hahahhahah Because it's all about ME!

 

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