Update, Smupdate

Allrighty, I am sort of back amongst the living out there in radioland. I can honestly say that I haven't read anything anybody has written or have a clue what's been going on for the past month. Let me just recap my month in delightful point form, just so you can get the scoop. It won't be an interesting read, per se, and not funny or anything, but it will at least get that first awkward "I've been away for too long" post out of the way. So let me take you back to July something or other, the last day of work before my holidays:

-- So I seem to remember me telling you all about going to the Dentist with the stupid tooth thing, so I'll backspace all that I just wrote about the whole thing and move onto the next day. So the next day, my first day of holidays, we have to take one of the kids to the Doctor for something or other and we have no sitter for the others, so we all go trotting up there. Oh, yeah, and so I tell him that I needed something stronger for the dentist, and he tells me to take 2 ativan next time. Remember that. Anyway, Kristen was complaining of a tooth ache all week, and remember, she had strep throat a few weeks prior to this. Remember that too. So, when she had the strep, she had a really swollen gland, so I ask my doc if he can look at her gland and see what it's like, and then I say "maybe just look at her throat." So he does. She's got an infection still, worse than ever. So he checks all of them. Baby has it too. She had it last time that Kristen did, so this bug is a pain in the arse. But whatver, we start holidays.

-- So we go to the lake, I think. The heat wave hits. Hideous, oppressive heat. Like, humidex of 48 and such. And it lasts forever. The days bleed into one. We stay at the lake for I don't know how long and sweat it out. Then we go from the lake to Saskatoon with my brother and sister in-law and their kids, and spend the night and take the kids swimming and to the museum and to the zoo and whatever else. Still sweating like pigs in the heat at this point too.

-- Then we had to come home and prepare for the big 50th anniversary for my parents. Now, we planned this thing, but they only wanted my aunt and her two kids and their families to come - long story. But we still had a hall, a catered meal planned, etc. But then, we don't know if it wil go as planned. My aunt suddenly can't come, because she kept breaking her ribs and finally her doctor told her she needs to be in a home because her bones were too bad. Then my cousin's hubby's mother was dying of cancer and if she croaked they weren't coming. So I was like why are we doing this? And then my sister was all pissy because I said I was going to do a slideshow a while back, but she thought we should do some powerpoint with captions and so that was arguments going back and forth, and then I got the distinct impression that all of them were implying that I wasn't doing my share, so I got so pissy and we ended up volunteering to shop for supplies, to decorate, and then I bought a new scanner/printer, scanned unti 3 a.m. for like 3 nights in a row, and made these fucking dvd slideshows. THEN, we bought them one of those digital picture frames so I had to figure that out.
So the day of the thing, my aunt travels with my cousin to the party, which was cool, and the cousin's mother in law died the day before but they still came. But THEN, my mother throws her back out and can't even sit, and she refuses to see a doctor ever, and got all huffy, so then everyone is thinking in the back of their heads that she's dying because she is refusing to even get her back checked and she's so creepily thin, and whatever, but she ends up at the party, and it goes fine, but the old people leave like by 7:30 or something, and my dad was all confused and it was just a gong show. BUT THEN, it gets better. The caterer is my sister's best friend, an awesome chef with a heart of gold. But she's got problems. Big ones. Problems with the drink. With gambling. So she's there with her wife (the "I am not convinced she IS a lesbian" lesbian wife, the one from NZ who is 400 lbs and is sort of crazy). And she's drunk, and she drinks my gin. But whatever.
But the next day, she comes and does breakfast for us. And I hear her tell her son (well, the step son) that she will buy him a game from Future Shop later. But then she goes back to her work to get containers for us to take stuff home in, right after we pay and tip her, and she doesn't come back. Leaves the kid with us. So she took the money, ran to the casino, and gambled for 6 hours and stuck my sister with her kid and us with the clean up.

-- Next day, we go to the National Park, hang out on the beach, and go to the retro candy store up there where I find not only Pop Shop Pop, but licorice Altoids. It was pretty damn exciting.

-- Then we spend days and days weeding the garden next door, and harvesting peas and such and picking berries and being all Quaker-ish. The fair comes to town so we take the kids to that, but a storm moves in as soon as we get there, and it rains off and on the entire time. Until we leave, of course.

-- Then we head to the lake for the long weekend. Then the heat wave finally breaks and rain sets in on Monday, so we decide to be spontanious and pack up the kids, go to Saskatoon, get a room at the Sheraton which has the best kid pools and stuff. We figure we'll catch the parade which goes right by, and then hit the S'toon Fair.
Heatwave comes back. It's like 33 degrees. Kristen is beyond crabby. Complains of a stomach ache forever. Looks green on the rides. So we head home that night and stop at Subway on the way out. I see a walk-in clinic next door so I say "let's just take her in the for the hell of it". So, I do, and what do you know, she's got a throat infection! A bad one. So, he gives me medicine that is gauranteed to kill the bug finally, but it's not covered my either of our plans so we have to pay 80 bucks for it. But it works, she's done it today, and we got approved for an exemption so it WILL be covered.

-- Then it's back to work for each of us, the next day. Then the day after, I have the dentist appointment. I take my two pills. Feel fine in there. Feel a little giddy. No panic. Until the drill.... when nausea sets in. But I make it. I have a temporary filling in now and it hurts but I go back in about 3 weeks or so. Pray for me.

-- Then the next day, last Friday, I feel sick. So tired I can't wake up, so I miss a day of work.
Then on Saturday, I am dizzy, but can eat normally again. On Sunday night, baby is up with a horrible fever. So we take her in Monday, and she's got the throat thing. So now everyone is on the mend.

-- And that boring story is the month in a nutshell.

-- Oh, wait, Mr. Kotter, I forgot something. Margo and Rochelle came to town so I got to meet her finally. She's a keeper. Fabulous. And of course, you knew Margo was in town because we had a frost warning. She brings the bad weather each time. I'm going to call her Katrina.

-- Oh, and we got a puppy. Shut up all you naysayers. He's 6 1/2 weeks old, black poodle, one of my inlaw's dog's pups. He's awesome. No name yet.

-- And that is all. Now that you are filled in, I can get back in the swing of things.... well, in a couple of days. I need to catch up on everyone else first!

-- Oh, and I've watched that Kathy Griffin show twice now and she's the funniest thing in the world, I kid you not. Have last night's BB taped so don't say a word.....